Okay, so this idea of receiving the Eucharist on my tongue has been on my mind for for-e-ver. Deep down in the smallest corners of my heart, I knew I wanted to start receiving the Eucharist on my tongue.. because that's what my holy role models do and who doesn't want to become more like their holy role models? And because I feel like it is more respectful towards Jesus.. not saying that receiving it on your hands isn't! Just for me I tend to kind of slack with my hands and not give the Host as much respect as I should, so I felt like receiving it on my tongue would be easier.
But for years I have shied away because of my inner list of a million and three things that could go wrong.
MY INNER LIST OF 1,000,00,003 THINGS THAT COULD GO WRONG
(I don't know if you have caught on or not, but I really like lists :D)
1. I drop the Host- AHHH I had a nightmare about this and I dropped the host and everyone was staring at me and I literally was so afraid to receive the Eucharist on my hands the next day it was so traumatizing...
2. I lick the sacristan.- #awkward
3. I look super stupid and super weird and everyone judges me-
who IS that girl? She has no clue what she is doing. (Which is right, but still.)
1,000,000,003. All three things occur at once- Scarier than a ghost on Halloween.
So my constant reminder of the aforementioned list of terror kept my in my safe little bubble of receiving the Host on my hands and wishing I was brave enough to receive it on my tongue immediately after I said "Amen".
BUT the story gets better.
I was at my Catholic church camp this summer (let's go Tekakwitha!) and we had a Mass on our first night to kick off the week. And being at a camp, you know, you get down and dirty. So I had a bunch of dirt and grime on my hands from who knows what, and I thought to myself, "I really shouldn't receive Jesus on dirty hands".
And then the next thought occurred... aren't our hands always dirty? Dirty with the sins we have, dirty with the mean thoughts we have thought about people... and physically dirty accidentally marker-ing yourself and such? But that's okay, because the power of forgiveness and confession wipes that all away. But I can't I am always squeaky clean when I line up in the Eucharist line.
And guys, as I was going up to receive communion, I felt this really strange but welcomed wave of courage flow into me, later to be named as the Holy Spirit. And I felt like I could conquer the world, and I had 0 fear of receiving the Host on my tongue! And guess what-
I did it! And I didn't drop the host, I didn't lick the priest, and I didn't look super stupid (actually I don't know that for sure)... but I am pretty sure I opened both my hands and my mouth because the priest got this super confused look on his face, but STILL.
And I gave God an imaginary little fist pump there and I was awkwardly smiling (well I guess you should be beaming after Communion I mean it's JESUS we're talking about here) and it was really great.
And ever since then, Maddie has been receiving the Eucharist on her tongue. And yes, she has licked a few people (so sorry about that) but she hasn't dropped the Eucharist yet! But she still has nightmares...
But it's all good. :) After all, it's JESUS we're talking about, can I get an amen? xD (If you actually said amen into your computer, you're my new favorite person).
Again, I don't want you guys to be under the impression that I am saying that you guys should all receive the Eucharist on your tongue. Nope, not at all! This is just something that has helped me progress in my spiritual life.. and if it works for you too that is awesome! You guys are great. Have a fantastic week!
All through Christ,
Maddie
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