/journal entry I / cast your anxiety on Him

The blue is information that I didn't write in my journal, but I added so you guys wouldn't be confused. Other than that, this all comes straight out of my journal. Have a blessed, and stress free week, and don't forget to cast your anxiety upon Christ.

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Sunday, March 8th, 2015
6:30 PM
Weary (I always write down one word that describes my emotions at the end of the day.)

God,

It's been a lonnng week, and I am sorry for neglecting to write. This whole play thing (I helped direct a 7th grade play at my school, and it was show week when I was writing this entry.) was beyond stressful and that's just another package on top of 8th grade, high school, driving, relationships, etc. It's getting hard to juggle God. Some of the packages are falling off, and everyday it's getting harder to pick them back up. I don't know if I can bear this much weight for the rest of my

life.

But I know what to do. When I was anxious about Tekakwitha (an overnight camp, I get stomach anxiety sometimes) last year, I remember giving it all to You, and look how it turned out. (very well indeed.)

So here God, take away my tired, weary soul. Fix the cracks in my heart, help me be excited for graduation, not stressed out about high school. Help me look forward to our talks, not dreading to get up early. let me have an open heart to change. Help me find time throughout this every-busy week and life to seek You, to rest in You... Here I am LORD, take it away and make something beautiful out of my hurt, and my heart because that is what you love to do: make the broken beautiful.

(This is one of my favorite worship songs, and I just felt called to write it down in my journal.)

I lean not on my own understanding

My life is in the hands of the Maker of Heaven

 

I give it all to You GOD
trusting that You'll make something

beautiful out of me

 

I give it all to You GOD

trusting that You'll make something

beautiful out of me

 

So I will climb this mountain

with my hands wide open

 

I will climb this mountain

with my hands wide open

 

I will climb this mountain

with my hands wide open

 

There's nothing I hold on to

Nothing I hold on to

Nothing I hold on to

 

Nothing I hold on to

Nothing I hold on to

Nothing I hold on to

 

 

"Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you."

1 Peter 5:7

 

"Come to Me, all you who are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yolk upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest in your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden light. " Matthew 11: 28-30

 

 

I think what this means is that You aren't going to take our sins, our faults, and our burdens and make them vanish. We are always going to have to carry a yolk, for we are sinners. But it's YOUR yolk that is easy and light. We will still be carrying burdens, yes, but You are right along besides me, whistling a happy tune, encouraging me when the road gets bumpy.

 

6:55 PM

I don't know if I feel peace yet or not, but that felt good. :) The writer/metaphorical person in me came out. Thank you God for being my coat holder.

 

-Madeline

 

Trial and Triumph- Lenten Style

So far, this Lent has actually been going pretty well. And by pretty, I don't mean all sugar and rainbows, and by well I mean the-best-Lent-that-I-have-had-yet-in-my-short-time-on-Earth.

Day One of Lent, my promises consisted of giving up all sweets and writing in my journal. A week or so in, things were going well except I was complaining more about sweets than school (which you know is a big deal). My mom and I had a chat, and she told me how she heard numerous homilies about how giving up sweets won't necessarily get you closer to God. And as I thought about it, I was like..."yes, that makes sense, because I have been more focused on how miserable I am than how to get closer to God." Don't get me wrong, there may be people out there who use that torture as a sacrifice to God, and they feel like it is helping them with their relationship. If that is you, kudos, and keep going!

So now I am really focusing on my journal, and it is a-mazing. I may actually do a "journal tour" so you all can see the messy spiritual-ness of my diary.

I have never really been a journal person though. I am someone who if I have a routine, I need to stick with it and have a schedule, otherwise it will fall apart. So the idea of journaling every day about randomness made no sense to me, until I saw some journal-spiration on Pinterest.

The cool calligraphy and pictures, and just overall organized chaos of the simple journal really intrigued me. And I realized it's kind of like writing a mini-blog post every day.. minus the readers and it's not all advice. So I set out on a quest to find the perfect journal. I didn't want it to be cheap, I wanted a quality diary that would make me feel good to write in. I wanted it to be ringed so I could turn the pages easier. I wanted a quote to be on it, I wanted it to be in a certain color.

I want
I want
I want.

After a week or so of searching, I realized that once again, I was caught up in the "making it perfect"

than focusing on God. So I went to Walmart, got a small, simple 5-Star book and started using it.

The things you learn from overachieving- God doesn't want perfect. He wants you no matter what shape, color or form you come in. So my writing may not lie in a 20 dollar Kate Spade journal, it lies humbly in some college-ruled lines, but God doesn't care.

And to tell you the truth- I love it because I can make it my own! I have already put my own quotes in there, I even made a college of Papa Francis (boredom=Papa Francis, don't ask :D) and I love it more and more each day, and I actually look forward to writing in it!

Here's to one Lenten post, look forward to many more in the near future. :)

All through Christ,

Maddie

If God is for Us, Who can be Against Us?

"Brothers and sisters:

If God is for us, who can be against us? 

He who did not spare his own Son, but handed Him over for us all, how will he not also give us everything else along with Him?

Who will bring a charge against God's chosen ones?

 It is God who acquits us, who will condemn?

Christ Jesus it is who died-or, rather, was raised-

who is also at the right hand of God, who indeed intercedes for us." 

Romans 8:31-34; Second Reading of the Second Sunday of Lent

If God is for us, who could ever be against us? What is in our way? With God, we can push away our laziness, we can go against the crowd, we can defeat the Devil. With God we can have the "courage" to wake up in the mornings...on time. We can have the will power of the Holy Spirit to ace that quiz. We can have the strength to help out a friend in need, even when you don't want to.

This Lent, rather than giving advice like I did in my Lenten Series last year, I am instead going to document my journey. So expect more heartfelt, random musings (wow you are so cool Maddie for using your blog title) and things that make no sense, but make total sense. 

I wish you all a great, faith-filled Lent. :)

All through Christ,

Maddie

You Know your Catholic when...

These always make a laugh!  Here (and here ) are some of the places I got these from, and others I made up myself. :) Take a laugh and pass it on!

YOU KNOW YOU'RE A CATHOLIC WHEN

When you use the Confiteor to apologize

When you and your friend make eye contact during Mass



The waiter politely stares off into space as your family prays the meal time prayer.
-
You have a specific problem so you Google its' patron saint.
-
When your flip open your Bible to find a really inspirational verse

When you are really feeling God's love and you just need a hug

You feel really awkward kneeling when the person directly in front of you is sitting...
-
You are always explaining what the Holy Trinity is and why Catholics don't worship Mary.
-
"It's okay if you fall asleep, the angels will pray the rest!"

"And also wi- AND WITH YOUR SPIRIT" 

You're at a pizza party... on Friday... during Lent... you know the rest.

People stare at you when you do the Sign of the Cross in public

"YOU'RE CATHOLIC TOO?!"

You forget about the "don't eat within an hour before Mass" rule

Hope you guys enjoyed it! Have a wonderful week!

All through Christ,

Maddie

God is so Amazing

God is really so amazing. So, so, so very amazing.

Last night was a roller coaster for me. It was my school's biannual Father Daughter Dance. I was actually pretty excited! I loved my dress, and I made my hair look all fancy (which I don't get to do very often. :D).  My dad, my sister and I went to a nice, quaint little Italian restaurant. It was all going pretty well, and I loved it so far!

I got to the dance, and not a lot of people were there. So we took some pictures, went into the Photo Booth, and got a picture with Elsa. (Yes, the Elsa from Frozen was actually there. I was quite excited.)

As more and more of my classmates showed up, more and more groups were being formed. I am a floater at nature, so I just went around and started to talk to people. They all pretty much said the same thing . "Oh, hey Maddie, I like your dress," and then they would go back to talking to their "friends". The more people I would talk to, the sadder I felt. I realized no one really wanted to talk to me. It wasn't like they were trying to be rude, they just would rather talk to other people. Some of them wouldn't even say hello.

I sat down with my dad, and we started talking. It was actually really cool, because most of the time I talk to my mom about my social problems and stuff. But to hear it from my Dad, I realized how much we are alike.

For some reason, I had a longing to go talk to God. The church was actually open, and empty, so my Dad and I went in there. It was dark except for the candle that is on almost the whole year. And all of these messy and raw emotions were pouring out of me, and I couldn't stop crying. I didn't get it. I just didn't get it. I felt like I have always been there for all of my friends. I would help them if they needed a ride home, or if they were feeling sad I would cheer them up. If their family member died, I would always try to tell them it would be okay.

So shouldn't they want to talk to me? Am I not social? Am I awkward, or weird? Why don't they want to socialize with me?

Click here for inspiring verses

I realized that all this emotion was bottling up inside of me for awhile. In school, anyways, I don't really have a best friend. I am friends with pretty much everyone, but nothing more than just simple "Hey, how's it going?" friends. I don't get invited to much, and they probably wouldn't want to hang out with me outside of school.

During conversations, I am always that person who is like "So what did you guys do?" Or "What are you talking about?" Because most of the talk consists of stuff they did together outside of school. I know I shouldn't be jealous, and I know it shouldn't bother me.... but some how it still does.

I remember one time I was invited to go bowling. I was so excited because like I mentioned before, I don't get invited to much. Turns out, I couldn't make it. Our family commitment this year has been Adoration. We will never miss Adoration unless it is an emergency. Well, guess when my event was? Right in the smack dab middle of our hour.

It's okay though, I went to CVS and my mom bought me some Oreos. I ate them all (it was a small box) and I didn't regret it.

So anyway, here I was, in the front pew of a dark church, crying. I didn't get it, I didn't get anything. But the only thing I did get is how amazing God is to let me cry out all my feelings to him.

My dad, who was with me during some of that time, left to go check on my sister. So it was just me and God, in an empty church.

I started whispering to God everything that I felt that time. I feel like God took all of my anger, and sadness, and turned it around into grace and comfort. I could feel Him working inside of me, comforting me.

Then a big realization jumped upon me.

What I was feeling, what I was sobbing about... is what Jesus feels every single day. 

I feel like I was always the good friend. I did everything right and I was always there for them... yet the still didn't want to hang out with me.

Jesus is ultimately the best friend anyone could ever have. Everything He does is perfect for us. He will always be here for us, and yet sometimes we ignore Him in turn for our other "friends". He is constantly crying for our sins. But He still has the time to comfort us, even with our piddly little human ramblings.

He died for us, and we just continue to turn our backs. So who was I to complain about not having girls want to talk to me?

I sat in God's presence for awhile.. then I heard a crack and realized that someone else was in the church. So, as you can imagine, I skedaddled out of there. I apologize to that person if they heard my ramblings.

But God, being amazing and always wanting His children to have fun, prompted me to go back
downstairs and join the party again. Well, join I did. I found some of my friends and started dancing to "Let it Go", with them. Turns out, I also won a raffle! God is really hilarious, because I never win anything, and the one time I do, I wasn't there to hear it!

All in all, the last part of the night was wonderful. We went out for ice cream afterward... a perfect end to a crazy day.

God really will take all your sorrows and mold them into something better. I remember telling God in the church "I know something good will come out of this, but I am not sure what." Well now I do.

God, you are so amazing.

All through Christ,

Maddie

January 22nd 1973

January 22nd 1973. The court ruled that a fetus does not have constitutional rights.  In other words, on that very day, abortion became legal.

It's been more than 40 years since this decision, and since then over 55 million babies have died. 55 million. That's 5 times more than people who died in the Holocaust, and 55 times the amount of American soldiers who have died in every war that the United States has fought. *

According to Bound 4 Life, a baby is aborted about every two seconds. In America, about 24% of all pregnancies end in abortion. 80% percent of women who have the abortion report belonging to a religion. A sad 27% percent of those women are Catholic. 

In a way, this is the new Holocaust. 

Webster-Merriam dictionary defines holocaust as 

"A thorough destruction involving extensive loss of life..."

At that time, Jews were not seen as people with rights. Today, unborn children aren't either. Millions upon millions died in the gas chambers, and millions more die in the womb before they have a chance to speak for themselves.

Many people argue that it is the woman's choice. Yes, woman do have choices, but they cannot choose to end another's life, no matter how young someone is. Yes, they have control of their body, but only theirs. How many people realize that that "lump of tissue" is actually a growing miracle? How many people know that a baby that they decided to kill could've grown up to do amazing things? They could've been the first woman president, or a doctor who cured cancer. They could've saved someone's life down the road, or become a model for everyone. Millions of children have never had the chance to play in the rain, or go to school. Some will never see the light of day, or the stars at night.

These children were robbed of their chance to live, all because many people cannot see that there is a life growing in the womb.

So, what can we do? 

Look out for a Pro-Life group at your church, youth group, or school. 

Wear a button, bracelet, or t-shirt promoting the Right to Life.

Pray at a local abortion facility.

Pray daily for lives of the unborn, and their mothers. 

Even though it may seem like we aren't getting anywhere, we are. I believe that if we keep our complete trust in God and ours hearts set on Him, we can win this. :) So put on your helmets and grab your shields. Are you ready to fight?

All through Christ,

Maddie

*This is a rough estimate. 

New Year's Resolutions | 5 Tips to Get You There

First off, Happy New Year everyone! I hope you enjoyed the last bits of 2014 as much as I did. I don't know about you, but I was really looking forward to a new year, and a new start!
New Years Resolutions. The easiest things to write down, but the hardest things to actually follow. I don't think I have even followed through with at least one resolution. Horrible, I know. Most of the time the resolutions are the same, like getting closer to God, or eating healthier, or being kind to people. But after a few trial and errors, I realized sketchy and vague resolutions aren't really going to get me anywhere.

1. The More Specific, the Better

What I like to do, is write down a really broad goal, and then write down more specific ways to achieve them underneath. For example-

Get Closer to God

-Pray for five minutes every morning and evening
 -write for my blog at least once a week
-Take an hour for God on the weekends

I feel like the more specific you are, the more you will work on it. If you have a really worked out and detailed plan for yourself, you feel like there is more to accomplish, rather than just "getting closer to God." 

 

2. Involve others

Who isn't inspired by other people cheering you along? Tell people your goals, and ask them to help you along the way. Even better, swap your resolutions and together you can inspire the other to keep up on their goal. You can make a routine- every week text, call or talk to each other about what you did good that week, and what you can work on.

 3. Get Inspired

I recently invested in a nice planner for 2015. Yes, it was a little pricey, but it is well worth the money! If you get a nice planner, it will inspire you to stay organized and in control of your events. I totally recommend using some money to buy yourself something that will keep track of your goals, events and thoughts during the year. My planner is great, it is kind of like a mashup of a journal, calendar, and activity tracker in one! (My planner is created by a brand called Mint Green and I got it at Walmart) So treat yourself in the beginning! If you invest in something bigger, you will feel more inspired.

This blog post is very simple, yet inspiring.

I love Inspiration walls. They are so great and well- inspiring! Just grab some magazines or print off some of your favorite quotes, and glue them to cardboard. Make it colorful, and make it yours. If it doesn't inspire you, don't put it up there! I recently renovated my room, and I have a whole wall dedicated to quotes. One of my favorites is, "If you feel like giving up, remember why you started." I think that quote will be my mantra for the year.

Another way of keeping inspired is kind of based on that quote. I have already started to work on exercising a little more so I'm not weak, and so I can be more fit for dance. I really pushed myself the first day, and then when I was being lazy the next day I was like "Do you really want all that hard work yesterday to go to waste?" Push your self more and more, and the finish line will become a little sweeter.

4. Have a mantra

I think that if you pick one main quote or Bible verse for the year that you can reflect on, it can really help you to keep inspired and keep going. You want to go deeper? Pick a virtue or quality that you admire for someone else, and stay focused on it. Every month you can choose a different virtue, while still staying true to your verse. Type it out, print it big and hang it up in a place where you will see it every day.

 

5. Make it reasonable, but make it worth it.

A lot of goals we make for ourselves sound swell the day that we make them, but then a week later we realize it is close to impossible. In some cases, it is just your brain and the Devil talking, but in some cases, it is true. Make sure that you can actually achieve the goals. However, you don't want to make some small, easily obtainable goal. The perfect goal is something that you can reach with hard work and dedication.

Want some ideas? Here are some of my New Years Resolutions (following #2 :) )

 

1. Be healthier

- look and feel healthy

-follow my routine every day (I wrote out a routine)

- judge by feeling, not by weight!

-eat the serving size

 

2. Prayer Routine

-Five minutes every day

    * Bible and Morning Offering

-Five minutes every night

    *Thanksgiving, Supplication, People to pray for, and Help

 

3. Stretch three days a week

 

4. Do something that scares me

    -big or small

    - every day

 

5. Post every week for Blog

     - hopefully every Sunday, but at least every week

 

6. Pray to and through others

-the Holy Spirit

-Confirmation saint (Teresa of Avila)

-Other saints

Also, one other helpful hint is make sure you check up on your goals again! Write them down and put them in a place where you can easily revisit them. Make sure you write down what you think you can achieve and don't change them!
Good luck to all, and have a great New Year!

All through Christ,

Maddie