Teresa of Avila

 

"It is here-my daughters- that love is to be found. Not hidden in away in corners, but in the midst of occasions of sin. Believe me, although we may more fail and commit small lapses, our gain will be incomparably greater." - Teresa of Avila

 

If it's not obvious yet, I will tell you that Saint Teresa of Avila is my Confirmation saint. People always ask me why I would choose this saint. Frankly, she wasn't too popular with my class, most people thought she was boring. At first glance, sure, she looks like a regular old nun.

But she was anything but regular. I chose her for her beautiful, passionate devotion to God. But many saints have that. I also chose her because she is not perfect, and had struggles that I can relate to. Many saints as beautiful as they are, just seem perfect. They were virgins, they died young, they were martyred. (Again, not saying that they aren't beautiful and inspiring and amazing because they are!) Teresa however, lived to a good old age. She grew up rich, and at first didn't want to be a nun. She loved the rich life, full of perfumes, jewelry and titled men. In fact, it was her father that sent her to the convent to be educated and safe from the outside world where her delicate health was not flourishing. It wasn't until later in her life that she realized God's love and calling for her.

Her relationship with God wasn't also picture perfect either. After she entered the convent, she loved and longed for prayer. She felt like she was were she was supposed to be. But then she got dangerously sick- sick enough to fall into a coma. Sick enough for people to assume she was dead, and they started to put wax on her body. It was a miracle that she survived, and it took her many months to recover. However, instead of feeling closer to God, she felt more distant. After she recovered, prayer felt forced and God felt far away. During her daily hour of prayer, she was counting the minutes until it was over. She didn't really know what was wrong.

Then her second conversion happened, when she was looking upon Christ's face, she became overwhelmed with a sense of sorrow and passion for our Lord. She wept for hours upon hours for Jesus, and sorrow for her sins.

"We ourselves feel like what we are doing is but a drop in the ocean. But the ocean would be less because of that drop."

Since then, she left a legacy. She was a part of the Carmelite order, but she felt it was a little to posh and generous for her sake. So she reformed, and created her own little order which partially focused on poverty. She went around the whole face of Spain, establishing many convents. She was discriminated, especially by the sisters in her former convent. They thought she was crazy, and just wanted attention. She was also condemned for her visions of God. During this time in Spain, anything that had to do out of the ordinary with Jesus was considered to be wrong, and made up only to appear holy. Throughout all of her life, Teresa was mocked for these. However, Teresa of Avila kept on going .

She was also a great writer, which is another reason of why I chose her. Her book, The Interior Castle, shows us the "castles" or stages of prayer. To me and to many others, Teresa was the queen of prayer and her writings showed it. She also wrote The Way of Perfection, which was kind of like a guide book for her sisters in the reformed convent. She became very good friends with Saint John of the Cross, who also wrote many great poems.


"Let nothing disturb you

Let nothing make you afraid.

All things are passing

God alone never changes

Patience gains all things.

If you have God

If you want for nothing,

God alone suffices."

Teresa was also a feisty one, which is also why I find her so great. When talking to God, Teresa complained about having people mistreat her. With good humor, God replied, "But that is how I treat my friends." Teresa, being the sassy person she was said back, "That must be why you have so few friends." Despite her fiery-ness, she also had a great, endearing personality, which drew many people to admire both her spiritual knowledge and her lovely company.

But her relationship with Jesus was so beautiful and loving, that it is hard not to be jealous. In fact, Jesus even appeared to her in a vision (one of many) and took her as His "spiritual" wife, and gave her a ring. An angel pierced her heart with a golden arrow to purify her soul. She would levitate sometimes during prayer because she was so close to God. One day she was standing in front of the convent, probably tending to something, and a small boy comes up in front of her. He asked her, "What is you name?" Teresa replied, "Teresa of Jesus" (this was her given name at the convent. Today she is known "of Avila" because she was born in Avila, Spain). The little boy smiles and said back, "Then I am Jesus of Teresa." How cool is that?!

And finally, Teresa's last words were "My Lord, it is time to move one. Well then, may Your will be done. O my Lord, and my Spouse, the hour that I have longed for has come. It is time for us to meet one another." She was so happy to finally meet the man she loved most, after all these years. And if I have even 1/100 of her devotion to God, I know that I will be on very good terms.

Saint Teresa of Avila, pray for us.

(Also, I ask that if you guys could please pray for me, since my Confirmation is coming up this Monday! I would appreciate all the prayers and the support to ask the Lord that I be ready and prepared to enter into this new chapter of my Catholic life. :) Thank you!)

 

 

 

the friday that changed the world

 (I ask before you start reading this, click here and listen to this song as you read.)

 

"Behold, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world." John 1:29

 

Today is Good Friday, the most important day in the history of mankind. Because without this day, without Jesus' terrible suffering and death, we would not be here. Nor would we be in Heaven.
Because this Friday is the Friday that changed the world.

 

 

"For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, to that everyone who believes in Him ma not perish, but may have eternal life." John 3:16

 

I don't think we realize how much Jesus really did suffer for us. Not only the unbearable pain of being whipped, shoved around, and having the heavy weight of a wooden cross on your bleeding shoulders, but having to know that He would die. Because His entire life, he knew that His crucifixion was coming. How would you act if you knew every day that passed was one day closer to your painful death? How do you tell your friends, your followers, your people?

 

 

"Judas, who betrayed him, was standing with them." John 18:5

 

Think of your best friend, right now. What do you love most about him/her? Their humor, their empathy, their loyalty? One of Jesus' best friends betrayed Him. It's not like it was some follower who went to all of Jesus' sermons, or a Pharisee even. Jesus had thousands of followers, but only 12 apostles and the one who betrayed Jesus was one of them.

 

"At the cross her sorrow sharing

Torn with grief and torment bearing

Bitter sorrow pierced her heart"

 

And in the midst of all this, is Mary. Mary, Jesus' beautiful mother, who also knew from the moment of His birth that He would be crucified. Mary understood that it needed to happen, but it didn't change the sorrow that "like a sharp sword, pierced her heart". Mother Mary, pray for us.

 

"Truly, this man was the Son of God." Mark 15:19

But why should it matter today? Of course, Jesus died, but that was 2,000 years ago. But along with the soldiers and the Jews, we nailed Jesus to the cross. Because of our sin, our selfishness and our shame, we were right along with the Romans as they pierced his flesh with a nail. Every time we sin, we are pounding that hammer. Think about it. Think about our loving, sweet, beautiful Jesus who had as much innocence when He was 33 years old that He did when he was born, to be nailed to a cross and left there to suffocate and die. Because of our fallen nature, we helped. O Loving Jesus, have mercy on us.

Map of scars

A crown of thorns

Through all this pain was Heaven born

 A wooden cross

Stood on that hill

Our Savior was dying

Even still

 He saw you.

 



But the most important thing in, Jesus doesn't care. He just loves. He loves you so, so SO much that if you were the only person in existence, he would die the same death as He did for billions of people . How does that make you feel? That a perfect, loved human being would undergo humiliation, scourging and crucifixion just for you? 

As he was hanging on that cross, HE SAW YOU. He really did, he saw you right now, he saw your birth, and he sees your death. But most importantly, he sees you with Him in Heaven and that makes Him smile because that is the very reason of  why He died! So we could be with Him in Heaven.  And to Him, all that suffering was worth it. To us, it should be too.

"Therefore we, before him bending,
This great Sacrament revere;
Types and shadows have their ending,
For the newer rite is here;
Faith, our outward sense befriending,
Makes the inward vision clear."

Pange Lingua

 

So today, I encourage you to stop everything. Stop your work, stop your social life, stop electronics.
Give up everything and spend some time with Jesus. If there is any Stations of the Cross or reflective hours at your church, go to it. Lock yourself in your room for an hour and sit and listen to Jesus. If gore doesn't bother you too much, I highly recommend watching either The Passion or the crucifixion of Jesus from The Bible Miniseries. When you see these actions come to life, you can really understand why and how Jesus did it.

Crack open your Bible, read some prayers. Light a candle and let God come to you. Because if Jesus could die for us, then I think we owe Him a little quality time.

Good Friday is the most beautiful day of the year. Make the most of it. :)

Have a blessed rest of your Triduum, and a very happy Easter!

All through Christ,

Maddie