/journal entry I / cast your anxiety on Him

The blue is information that I didn't write in my journal, but I added so you guys wouldn't be confused. Other than that, this all comes straight out of my journal. Have a blessed, and stress free week, and don't forget to cast your anxiety upon Christ.

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Sunday, March 8th, 2015
6:30 PM
Weary (I always write down one word that describes my emotions at the end of the day.)

God,

It's been a lonnng week, and I am sorry for neglecting to write. This whole play thing (I helped direct a 7th grade play at my school, and it was show week when I was writing this entry.) was beyond stressful and that's just another package on top of 8th grade, high school, driving, relationships, etc. It's getting hard to juggle God. Some of the packages are falling off, and everyday it's getting harder to pick them back up. I don't know if I can bear this much weight for the rest of my

life.

But I know what to do. When I was anxious about Tekakwitha (an overnight camp, I get stomach anxiety sometimes) last year, I remember giving it all to You, and look how it turned out. (very well indeed.)

So here God, take away my tired, weary soul. Fix the cracks in my heart, help me be excited for graduation, not stressed out about high school. Help me look forward to our talks, not dreading to get up early. let me have an open heart to change. Help me find time throughout this every-busy week and life to seek You, to rest in You... Here I am LORD, take it away and make something beautiful out of my hurt, and my heart because that is what you love to do: make the broken beautiful.

(This is one of my favorite worship songs, and I just felt called to write it down in my journal.)

I lean not on my own understanding

My life is in the hands of the Maker of Heaven

 

I give it all to You GOD
trusting that You'll make something

beautiful out of me

 

I give it all to You GOD

trusting that You'll make something

beautiful out of me

 

So I will climb this mountain

with my hands wide open

 

I will climb this mountain

with my hands wide open

 

I will climb this mountain

with my hands wide open

 

There's nothing I hold on to

Nothing I hold on to

Nothing I hold on to

 

Nothing I hold on to

Nothing I hold on to

Nothing I hold on to

 

 

"Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you."

1 Peter 5:7

 

"Come to Me, all you who are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yolk upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest in your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden light. " Matthew 11: 28-30

 

 

I think what this means is that You aren't going to take our sins, our faults, and our burdens and make them vanish. We are always going to have to carry a yolk, for we are sinners. But it's YOUR yolk that is easy and light. We will still be carrying burdens, yes, but You are right along besides me, whistling a happy tune, encouraging me when the road gets bumpy.

 

6:55 PM

I don't know if I feel peace yet or not, but that felt good. :) The writer/metaphorical person in me came out. Thank you God for being my coat holder.

 

-Madeline

 

Trial and Triumph- Lenten Style

So far, this Lent has actually been going pretty well. And by pretty, I don't mean all sugar and rainbows, and by well I mean the-best-Lent-that-I-have-had-yet-in-my-short-time-on-Earth.

Day One of Lent, my promises consisted of giving up all sweets and writing in my journal. A week or so in, things were going well except I was complaining more about sweets than school (which you know is a big deal). My mom and I had a chat, and she told me how she heard numerous homilies about how giving up sweets won't necessarily get you closer to God. And as I thought about it, I was like..."yes, that makes sense, because I have been more focused on how miserable I am than how to get closer to God." Don't get me wrong, there may be people out there who use that torture as a sacrifice to God, and they feel like it is helping them with their relationship. If that is you, kudos, and keep going!

So now I am really focusing on my journal, and it is a-mazing. I may actually do a "journal tour" so you all can see the messy spiritual-ness of my diary.

I have never really been a journal person though. I am someone who if I have a routine, I need to stick with it and have a schedule, otherwise it will fall apart. So the idea of journaling every day about randomness made no sense to me, until I saw some journal-spiration on Pinterest.

The cool calligraphy and pictures, and just overall organized chaos of the simple journal really intrigued me. And I realized it's kind of like writing a mini-blog post every day.. minus the readers and it's not all advice. So I set out on a quest to find the perfect journal. I didn't want it to be cheap, I wanted a quality diary that would make me feel good to write in. I wanted it to be ringed so I could turn the pages easier. I wanted a quote to be on it, I wanted it to be in a certain color.

I want
I want
I want.

After a week or so of searching, I realized that once again, I was caught up in the "making it perfect"

than focusing on God. So I went to Walmart, got a small, simple 5-Star book and started using it.

The things you learn from overachieving- God doesn't want perfect. He wants you no matter what shape, color or form you come in. So my writing may not lie in a 20 dollar Kate Spade journal, it lies humbly in some college-ruled lines, but God doesn't care.

And to tell you the truth- I love it because I can make it my own! I have already put my own quotes in there, I even made a college of Papa Francis (boredom=Papa Francis, don't ask :D) and I love it more and more each day, and I actually look forward to writing in it!

Here's to one Lenten post, look forward to many more in the near future. :)

All through Christ,

Maddie

If God is for Us, Who can be Against Us?

"Brothers and sisters:

If God is for us, who can be against us? 

He who did not spare his own Son, but handed Him over for us all, how will he not also give us everything else along with Him?

Who will bring a charge against God's chosen ones?

 It is God who acquits us, who will condemn?

Christ Jesus it is who died-or, rather, was raised-

who is also at the right hand of God, who indeed intercedes for us." 

Romans 8:31-34; Second Reading of the Second Sunday of Lent

If God is for us, who could ever be against us? What is in our way? With God, we can push away our laziness, we can go against the crowd, we can defeat the Devil. With God we can have the "courage" to wake up in the mornings...on time. We can have the will power of the Holy Spirit to ace that quiz. We can have the strength to help out a friend in need, even when you don't want to.

This Lent, rather than giving advice like I did in my Lenten Series last year, I am instead going to document my journey. So expect more heartfelt, random musings (wow you are so cool Maddie for using your blog title) and things that make no sense, but make total sense. 

I wish you all a great, faith-filled Lent. :)

All through Christ,

Maddie